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Thursday, 26 July 2012



What the great, crunchy, crispy Christ are you doing there?

I'm sitting on the window sill........haven't you ever seen a cat sitting on a window sill

It's the outside window sill, a bedroom window sill, a first- fucking- floor window sill !! 
Get your furry little butt inside now before I kick it from here to Edinburgh.

But it's a great view. Look, I can almost reach that........whoops, well maybe I can't
reach that bird.
'Come here and say that , you feathery little bastard!!'

OMG, OMG, please, Minerva, darling, please come back in.

Darling? Blimey, you are nervous. Tell me, have you ever seen me balance on
just my back paws? It's awesome....look.

AAAARGHHHH!!! Please Minerva, for the love of God, for the sake of my blood
pressure, please come in.

Awww, you do love me after all......come to my paws, my beamish staff.

I just didn't want to have to scrape you off the patio also, you are an arsehole.


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